Third, the one with the hairy chest

I seem to have an affinity for the number 3.

The other day as my dad was giving me one of his lectures, something he's been doing frequently ever since I finished SPM, imparting words of wisdom on the hardships of life I will surely encounter from here on, he mentioned this almost as an afterthought. "I've noticed, Bibah, wherever you are, whatever school you go to, you are always in third place. Never second or first place. Do you like that number or something?" he said. I was left speechless for a few seconds because I know. I've noticed it too.

At the first school I attended, I managed to rank third in my school year in the final exams for three consecutive years. The top student, a friend of mine who was tall and wore glasses, also came in first for three consecutive years. The number two student, however, was never the same person in all those three years. At least, not as I remember it. Then we moved to England where I enrolled at a nearby primary school. There are no rankings in English schools. The same in the high school I moved up to. No rankings. Then we came back and I went to the SMK in town furthest from my house, where, in my last two years there, I placed third.

I'm sorry, Umi, Abi, that I never made you proud by being the top student. I'm also sorry to say that placing first had never been my goal. My goal was always to not embarrass myself. And then when I realised I shouldn't care what other people think of me, it became to surpass myself. To continually improve on my current self.

Thinking it through though, there are some perks to placing third. I never specifically aimed for third place but it turned out to be the perfect place for me. Knowing that there are people doing better than me gives me the motivation to work harder. If they can do it then so can I. Also, although number 3 gets some spotlight, the top two obviously steal the show. Which is a great thing because it lets the awkward, clumsy number 3 relax most of the time. Oh I don't think I could handle all the attention directed towards the top student. Not to mention the pressure of maintaining that first place.

Forgive me, dear parents. Your daughter is not ambitious enough.

But all throughout my learning life I shall hold on to these words:

I don't believe you have to be better than everybody else.

I believe you have to be better than you ever thought you could be.

P.S. I'll explain the title because I'm sure you laughed when you read it and can see no relevance to the post now that you've read through it. In England, there was a funny children's rhyme the kids used to recite almost like a song. Zero, the hero. First, the worst. Second, the best. Third, the one with the hairy chest... And it goes on but that's all I can remember.